thoughts on modern sanitation.

9:00 last night. Came home to find:

...a toilet so stopped up that they are going to have to REMOVE THE WHOLE TOILET from floor to get at blockage. I have no idea how this happened, although plumbing has been strangely unenthusiastic the last few days. Perhaps one of the cats knocked a bunch of furry toys down the loo and then tamped them down with a wooden spoon to make sure they stayed put (wouldn't put it past them), but let me say, as delicately as I can... There is nothing like seeing entire days' worth of, oh, say, effluvia, that you never hoped to see again--in fact were counting on never seeing again, which is, indeed, why you pressed "flush"--augured back up by a grouchy maintenance man who manages to convey, with that kind of beleaguered exasperation they can have, that these things Just Don't Happen, that it has to be something you did. Yes, because I WANT to be spazzing out, moritified, mad and completely frustrated, wondering if I should pay a 24-hr plumber money I don't have, and, now that I can't use the loo, fighting a constant sense of having to pee. Very mortified.

Fun. We're on Plumber Visit #3 right now. I understand they have to blame something, because something did Cause This to Happen. That is true. I want to find the malefactor as much as they. In fact, I'm starting to look forward to the blame process, because that'll mean it's fixed. I'll be the goat on the stake if need be, that's fine. I plan on giving everyone fistfuls of cash when this is over out of sheer relief/joy.

Just had confab with mother; feeling better knowing that there are at least two literary turns for this to take when it's all over and Funny again. And when I've slept.