Saturday, June 09, 2007

Dear Diary

1. I haf a new love (left). You should see it tearin up ice cubes. LOVE. Red. I am Oster Izer.

2. DON'T fall asleep watching the DVD of Send Me No Flowers. Because that means you get stuck on the home screen which plays the the theme song over and over. It is a diseased little tune to have follow you into your dreams and out. Also don't fall asleep in the middle of parodies of horror movies, because they scream way too much.

3. Oh the Chicago of the 80s! In the movies! Tom Hanks is wheeling his Jeep into the Marina City parking lot (he's an ADman!)! Gregory Hines and Billy Crystal are being all bad and knowing and shit (they're COPs!)! Rob Lowe is selling restaurant supplies (with Jim Belushi!)! Yeah, man!

4. "I gave you the best 23 minutes you had all year!" "No way, back off, man!" "Oooo...bamboo...."

5. HEAVY HEAVY WANTS! Someone
online alerted me to this (right)...I WANT ONE! ME MAKE BIG GIRL TEA! BRING WATER TO BOIL ADD BIG GIRL & STEEP!!! HAPPY HAPPY HAPPPY!!!!

5a. I have figured out my musical personality (percentages not definite):
  • 20% bad 80s strip club DJ
  • 5% Minneapolis club rat
  • 10% paws-clasped-together shrieking fangirl
  • 10% nose-picking punk
  • 20% gouty old opera-loving lawyer
  • 5% closeted Sondheim-loving queen
  • 5% clenched early-musick loving ascetic
  • 5% dispassionate but earnest academic
  • 10% torch singer/torch listener
  • 5% comb-in-back-pocket airguitaring classic rocker
  • 2.5% finger-snapping beatnik
  • 2.5% weepy folkie
  • a lot% wannabe Marcy Mays
  • other traces to be determined

6. I'm sorry, but...Amy Winehouse (after/before). It's not just that it's all wrong most any way you can look at, but the thing that strikes me these days is the way that fame Requires This. Of WOMEN. Horribly impersonal. Sacrifices laid on the altar. You can't have yourself, you can't stick out, you can't take up space because then oh then and I'm sorry, but this is still true in this ragingly sexist world, you are doing what you shouldn't be. Try watching E! for 1/2 a second. See how they treat the pecadillos of the size 0 vs. the size 14. It's like people are different species. Plus this photo adds a new filip to her whole neo-Ronette persona. You Gotta Get a Gimmick...

7. I was a test-patient for some PT students this week. I felt like Gulliver being attended to by the Jeri Ryans. It was very interesting!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Your knowledge of music is frightening and encyclopediaic. I have never in my life met a person who has a wish list of Tupac songs, advised me about the entire oeuvre of Dr. Dre and also at the same time spent a few nights verklempt and weeping at some Leonard Bernstein documentary. At the same time knowing all the gossip of every opera singers, broken down blueswoman, and jazz chanteuses. Why are you able to talk on the phone when I call you?

xo, Skip

Hanne Blank said...

I know why you want that dutchtub thing and it's not about the hot water. I noted the hot blonde hunkola from the website photos and suspect you of setting up a package deal thing...

Clover said...

um, you can add george clooney to the amy winehouse list. remember back when he was a classic all-american hunk?
in chicago this week for the ocean's 13 premier he looks like he's just run the boston marathon. ick. somebody give that man a sandwich!igno
he used to be so hunky...