1)

I.
am.
tired.
of.
illin'.
*pause*
Thank you.

2)

I am always a sucker for The Natural.

3)

The bits of marital relationship revealed twixt Jeffrey and Ina on Barefoot Contessa are clearly just white foam on the heaving seas of love.

4)

I have ordered some serious deli food (knish, kreplach, chicken soup) in the hopes that ingestion thereof will ameliorate the situation under item #1. I am also drinkin today's very Wacky Smoothie, which is the only thing that helps my mid-late/afternoon fever spike calm down.

5)

We really haven't yet built a better mouse trap, in as much as millions of humans all over American bend and scoop litter each day. We are litter bitches. I did a lot of research about hands-off, miracle litter boxes when I moved to this apartment, but no one's yet really made one. There are $300-$400 ones that seem okay, but are clearly just not going to catch on. It's almost enough to make you move to the suburbs. With a catflap and where the cats poop I dunno, but at least I don't have to think about it anymore. Maybe...Naperville. Darien. Bethesda.

6)

I would give most anything for a pool, jacuzzi, hot tub or bath tub that'd let my fat bum float around a bit in it. Will gear vocational plans around said goal once illin' is over.